


Maeby This Time

by Darkangel1214



Category: Arrested Development
Genre: F/M, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-28
Updated: 2013-06-02
Packaged: 2017-12-13 05:04:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 4,362
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/820320
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Darkangel1214/pseuds/Darkangel1214
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Maeby returns to the model home after being released from jail for being a sex offender and discovers a couple of surprises. Spoilers for Season 4</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Maeby Funke was being dropped off by police officers in front of the model home her family built. They only left after they were satisfied there were no kids under the age of seventeen around the neighborhood. Maeby was arrested as sex offender for having sex with a seventeen year old Perfecto Telles, whom she thought was an undercover cop and was trying to get him arrested as a sexual predator. With no actual proof or video of the alleged act and Perfecto's foster mother Lucille Austero also known as Lucille 2, failing to show up in court, the charges were dropped. But there was still only one place she could go.

So that's where she found herself a few weeks after Cinco de Cuatro. She walked down the sidewalk and to the familiar door. She reached for the doorknob, pulled very gently and the knob came off in her hand. She looked at it, dropped it on the ground and pushed on the door which swung open easily. She sighed as she entered shitty model house that belonged to her family.

Maeby wondered how her life ended up like this.

"How the # $% did I end up like this?" she asked herself. She had it all; she was on top of the world, literally. Maeby supervised the filming of "A Very Gangy Christmas" at the North Pole. Maeby had been a popular movie executive, a high rolling madame and started the highly sought after Internet Company The FaceBlock. But now she was right back here, where she started.

Maeby walked around the empty house, looking for anything to do, the model homes still had no internet connection and the tv didn't work, but she did find three brand new boxes of the game Twister. She was quickly growing bored, at least in the jail they had plenty of activates scheduled.

It was a week later when she found herself hovering over the toilet for the third time that day and the tenth time that week that she figured it out. So she went to the grocery store to pick up some real food to eat.

Later on she was sitting on the lid of the toilet tapping her foot on the ground, waiting. When the timer went off she stood up and took a deep breath and walked over to the sink. She closed her eyes and prayed for the first time in her life. She opened her eyes slowly and looked down at the counter…at the white stick lying on it.

" #$#% me"

Maeby stared at the blue plus sign hoping it would magically change into something else. It didn't.

She leaned back against the wall and stared at reflection in the cracked in mirror in the guest bathroom. What was she going to do now; she was having a baby with a seventeen year old.

Maybe this is what Maeby needed to finally grow up. Well this will keep the other sex offenders out of this place. She thought to herself as she went to make something to eat. As she was eating cereal Maeby wondered if she should tell her parents she was pregnant. Nah she decided. There was no reason to tell them. Having a teenager's baby, with no job and no money wasn't something big enough to get their attention. She needed something else to really shove in their faces. She was determined to find something.

Tbc…


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> While searching the house because she was bored, Maeby finds something interesting in a briefcase that her Uncle Michael left there.

Maeby Funke was once again restless; the morning sickness that pretty much lasted all day had kept her distracted. But now that part appeared to be over. So she now she had time on her hands to think about how bored she was being stuck in the house.

She was surprised at how much work it took to be pregnant and even more surprised her mother did this. With the way she is now, Maeby was surprised she survived to be born. There were books to read which she used as coasters and doctor appointments and pills to take.

She did find manage to find a doctor and was given the pills to take. She really didn't have anyone else to ask, so she called Mort up and told him about her situation and he told her about a free clinic that the celebrities go to when they want to be discreet; all they need to do is sign an autograph. He told her that's where January Jones went to and came out knocked up. Since she already had the part down, all she needed was the celebrity.

-Two Months Earlier-

She walked into the Distant Creet Center and walked up to the front desk. "Hi, may I help you?" the young looking woman with a fake southern accent at the desk asked her.

"Yes, I'm hoping you can. I'm Elaine from Seinfeld" she told the woman with a wink. She was wearing a light brown trench coat, a blue jays hat and big sunglasses that she figured belonged to Gangy. She didn't take off her disguise, the woman jsut took her at her at her word.

"OMG!" the woman squealed with delight. Maeby nodded and pulled out a head shot of Julia Louie-Dreyfus and proceeded to sign it and handed it over to the woman. She took it gratefully and told her the doctor would see her now.

-Present Day-

She decided to see if there was anything hidden in the walls, but had gotten as far as the living room before it tired her out. So she plopped down on the couch to take a nap. However something didn't feel right. There was something underneath in her back that was making it uncomfortable Without getting up she reached underneath the cushion. That took some time since she refused to get off the couch to pull out what she found.

Finally after some struggling, she freed the item. She looked at it, it was her Uncle Michael's brief case. He must've thrown it there when he was angry and it slid underneath the cushion. Maeby opened it up and pulled out the papers inside it. Most of them papers were torn in half so she had to sit up and lay them on the couch to piece them together. As she read them her face lit up with a smile. These were the signatures of her family members giving away their rights to the movie based on their life. The very movie she pitched to Imagine Entertainment.

She picked up her phone. There was no signal. So she had to leave the house and walk around until she could get some bars to make her call. She was on the street just outside Sudden Valley development when she could finally use her phone.

"Hey, Ron. It's Maeby Funke, I got them" she her former boss as she started taping the paper's together. All she needed was to get George Michael's.

Tbc..


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Maeby goes to George Michael to get him to sign his rights to the movie, but George Michael becomes distracted by the other bombshell she drops on him.

Maeby looked at her phone, and then dialed his number. He picked up on the first ring. "You know what I wish you were on that fake plane on the 605!" he screamed angrily into the phone. "George Michael?" she asked confused. She had never heard her cousin's voice that loud or angry before. It was kind of sexy in an angry Muppet kind of way.

"Maeby!" he replied also confused since he assumed it was his father calling to apologize for sleeping with his girlfriend and didn't bother to look at the caller ID. "It's you" George Michael was relieved to hear it was his cousin. So much had been going on his life. He needed someone to talk too, but then he remembered how they had left things. "I know we didn't leave off in the best of circumstances…"

Maeby furrowed her brows even though he couldn't see her. "Yeah, whatever, that's fine I got a new job or well I guess it's not new. I got old my job back" She told him.

"At the movie studio?" George Michael asked to clarify. "Oh" he said excitedly, "That means you graduated high school!"

"No, still didn't graduate but I can't go back there anymore for… legal reasons" she said, she had to get on the subject of the movie.

"You know, I need to get out. Do you want go get a drink?" he asked her.

"Drink? Sure" she replied, if she got him drunk it would be much easier to get him to sign the papers.

Unbeknown to them, they lived right next door to each in Sudden Valley. So when they both exited their houses at the same time, they were both lost in their own thoughts and problems that they failed to notice each other pulling out of their driveways at the same time and had followed each other to the restaurant and showed up at the exact same time.

At the Ealing Club Maeby went to get her membership card when George Michael held her arm. "I got this" he told her and walked over to the desk. "George MaHarris"

"Mr. Maharris, of course, go right up" she told him smiling sweetly at him.

Maeby forced a smile on her face as well and followed him to the elevator. He went straight to the bar to order and ordered a sea breeze. She ordered water and they found a table to sit at.

George Michael sipped his drink through a straw and looked at his cousin. "So, I haven't seen you in awhile"

"You mean since you fired me" she said.

"Yeah, I was hoping that wouldn't come up. But it did!" He said with a forced smile.

"Yeah, sorry. I'm not really mad about that or anything" she told him and put the glass to her mouth. She was still a little mad about that. She actually did a lot of work to get that going. But she put the glass down and smiled at him.

"Well, uh… how you've been?" he asked bringing the straw to his mouth again.

"In jail" Maeby replied.

George Michael spit the straw out of his mouth and coughed "What?" he asked making sure he heard correctly. "Jail?"

"It was noting, It was thrown out. But I want to know how you are?" she asked him sitting up straighter to portray she was going to pay attention. "You seemed upset when you answered the phone."

He leaned his mouth to the straw and sucked in angrily. "Yeah, I am angry" he told her. "You see…my girlfriend, Rebel, well you know her. You introduced us." He paused to finish his drink and motioned for the bar tender to bring him another. "I told you she was seeing someone else because she told me she was and I didn't care…" Mabye rose her eyebrow at that. "Well I told her I didn't care. Well anyways it turns out that other guy is my father"

"NO!" Maeby said pretending to be surprised at that news. "Uncle Michael is seeing Rebel too?" Maeby had found that out earlier when her Uncle Michael told her he was dating Rebel Alley. But that was when she was still mad at George Michael for firing her.

"I know right. And that's not all" George Michael said to her while he was halfway done with his second drink. "If I knew my dad was seeing her, I would've stopped and he said he would've too. But you see…he did know. He found a picture of us and I told him I was upset about Rebel wanting to break up and he pretended he didn't know and kept pursuing her"

"Man" Maeby said to him, shaking her head. "That's rough. But you know as we say in show business" she told him and took a drink of her water.

"What?" George Michael asked wanting to hear the answer. "What do you say in show business?"

"That's it, that's what we say" she responded.

George Michael now furrowed his brow at her. "I think there's... more to that"

"No" Maeby said shaking and nodding her head. "I think that's it"

George Michael just shook his head and tried to get the bar tenders attention again. He looked at Maeby. "Do you want another drink?" he asked before realizing she only had a glass of water in front of her.

"Oh, I'm not drinking" she told him.

"You're not, why?" He asked. He never knew Maeby to turn down a drink, especially if he was paying.

"I can't" she replied. "I'm pregnant" she said with a smile.

George Michael was couching having almost choked on his own spit. "What!?" he managed to squeak out.

"Yeah, I'm pregnant. Sixteen weeks, so that's like what, five months or something"

He was completely shocked to hear that news while also thinking what a horrible math tutor he had been.

"I don't know why they don't just stick to months, since it's easier to count" Maeby said while George Michael was still trying to comprehend what she told him. "Well anyways, I think I know a way to get back at your father. My studio wants to make a movie about our lives. So you if you sign this piece of paper, we can start putting it together"

"You're pregnant?" was the only thing he could think of saying.

"Yep" she replied with a smile. "But that's not important. What is important is this movie. Doing it this my way, we can tell your story the way you want to tell it. Um about that?" she asked looking at him. His eyes were wide and blinking rapidly and his hand hung loosely over the arms of the chair. "George Michael? What do you think? Why don't you sign this and we can discuss it"

"The father?" he finally croaked out when he could find his voice.

"That's complicated" she said shrugging that off. "So about this movie, huh. Sounds like a good idea right?"

"A baby…Maeby…" he stuttered out.

"I can see we're still stuck on that, so I think you need another drink. Bartender!" she called out. "Another sea breeze or maybe two?"

Tbc…


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Maeby brings in some help for George Michael’s internet company The Faceblock. George Michael having forgotten about his girlfriend Rebel Alley decides to devote all his time to making sure Maeby is okay.

Having gotten completely plastered on three Sea Breezes Maeby drove George Michael back to the model home, where he proceeded to quickly pass out on the couch. The next morning when he woke up with a hangover she started to pitch him again on making the movie. "So about this movie, I think it would be good for you to get your feelings out there" she said as she handed him a cup of coffee.

George Michael looked at his cousin with eyes barely halfway open. He took the cup from her gratefully and took a sip and immediately started coughing. "What…kind…of…sugar…is this?" he choked out.

"Oh, I don't have sugar so I used parmesan cheese" Maeby replied. "So it's like Italian coffee"

He pushed the cup away and ran to the sink and shoveled water into his mouth with his hands. Then fell back on the counter. "Good, you're awake now" she said with a smile. "I kind of need this movie to keep my job" she told him.

George Michael was still recovering from the worst cup of coffee he had ever had in his life, but he did hear what Maeby told him. He looked at her, then at her still flat stomach and thought that she would need the money now. She had a kid to take care off. So he knew what he had to do. "Sure, I'll sign it" he told her and smiled.

"Really? Great" she said and put the contract on the island and held out a pen for him. That was all she needed to guarantee her job. She didn't realize how much she missed it until she didn't have it anymore. That probably should be a saying or something, she thought to herself.

Later that day Maeby was sitting across from Ron Howard in his office finalizing the deal to make a movie about her family.

"Here you go my family's signatures giving away their rights" she said and handed him folder, that also had the finished script that she found in the arrested development pile, where Kitty had mostly likely put it when she got her fired.

Ron Howard stood up and shook her hand. "Great, now we can get started" he told her. She stood up to leave. "Welcome back, Maeby" he told her.

"Thanks" she said to him and walked out of his office. Mort got up to follow her. She had brought with to be on this project with her. He was grateful to be back at the studio too.

Maeby plopped the bag from Klimpy's on George Michael's desk at the hanger startling him. "Maeby, hi" George Michael said awkwardly as she sat on top of his desk, he wasn't expecting her to show up here. "I thought you'd be at work"

"I'm on my lunch and I had this intense craving for grease" she told him as she reached into the bag and pulled out a burger. "I brought you one too. Figured you could use it to boost your brain power or something" she then bit into the burger and leaned over his laptop. "So are you almost 200% done with it?" she asked.

George Michael slid his computer over and shut it so she wouldn't spill on it or see that he was playing angry birds. "I'm not even a 100% done with it" he told her nodding and smiling, correcting her math wouldn't help the matter of he had nothing done and had no idea how to even do it. He pulled the bag closer to him and looked inside. He saw that there were two burgers still inside the bag. He supposed she was eating for two now she she'd need another one. He shrugged and took out one of the burgers.

He was taking another bite when he heard the door of the hanger open. "Are we expecting someone?" he asked her confused. Maeby ignored him and jumped of the desk and walked towards the person entering his office. George Michael turned around to see a young, brunette woman walking towards them dressed in all black with a purple streak down hair, dark eyeliner and spikes on her bracelets.

"George Michael, this is Mabel Meyers. She's goes to UCLA and she's Mort's daughter" Maeby said by way of introductions.

"Okay" George Michael said not sure what was going on.

"She's going to help with you The Faceblock" Maeby continued as they both women walked closer to him.

"Help…me" George Michael said with a squeak.

"Yeah, she's a programmer" Maeby told him, and then she walked closer to him. "I figured out that you have no idea what you are doing" she told him. "She can. She knows you have nothing"

George Michael smiled shyly at the scowling scary woman and pulled Maeby aside. "You told her everything?" he asked.

"Yeah" Maeby replied. "Don't worry she won't tell anyone. We'll have to pay her of course when we get the money."

What Maeby was neglecting to tell her cousin was that Mabel was her cellmate when she was in jail. Mabel was in there for hacking a popular illegal movie downloading website. Maeby promised to not tell her movie executive father if she helped them attempt to make the program they were promising the world. Maeby figured who better to make an anti-piracy software then a person that hacks into other people's stuff.

"I don't know" George Michael said scratching the back of his head while trying to not make eye contact with the strange girl.

"She owes me one, so this is how we are working it out" Maeby told him. "So you two have fun" She said as she turned to leave.

"You…you're not staying?" George Michael asked. He was a little afraid of the punk rocker looking girl and didn't want to be alone with her. Even though all she was doing was eating the third burger Maeby had bought.

"Can't, I have a doctor's appointment and a meeting with the studio at three" she told him and walked out of the hanger.

Tbc…


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Maeby pitches an idea of a new movie. George Michael moves in with Maeby.

Maeby was sitting at the over-sized black marble conference table in a comfy leather chair as the boss was looking over the scripts they presented to him. After he closed the last folder, he stood up and threw it in the middle of the table. "These are horrible!" he screamed. "We need something new. Sequels! Are what's in now!"

They all stared at each other from around the table shouting out ideas. " I know we said it was going to be the last one, but I'm feeling another Gangee flim" Maeby spoke up. "Gangee Six…on Mars!" she said holding her hands up for emphasis.

The latest of the Gangee franchise had just made $10 million above analysts' pre-release projections. Continuing the trend of each installment made more money than the last.

"hmmm" he said scratching his beard. "People want to go to Mars" he said thinking out loud. "Will there be Aliens?"

"Yeah, obviously" Maeby answered. How can you have a movie take place on mars without martians.

"Perfect!" he said. "Let's get on that" he told the rest of the room then he looked at her. "Where have you been Funke?" he asked her.

"I was fired" she told him.

"Well, fire whoever did that" he told them.

"We're going to need a lot of sand or a desert for this" Jeff the location scout said to the room. "Some place abandoned, a place where no one wants to go"

Maeby smiled. "I know a place, but it's going to cost us" she told them smiling to herself. She pulled her tablet closer to her and tapped the address in. She then plugged her tablet into the projector to put it on the screen hanging on the wall.

"That'll work" Jeff said to her.

"Pay whatever price you need, just get that land" the boss said, got up and left the room.

Maeby walked into the model home to find George Michael in the kitchen. She was happy with what she accomplished today, she found a way to keep people handing her money and make even more in money in the process.

"You should've told me you were going to be late" George Michael said forlornly next to the table he had set. He'd been waiting for over an hour, he called her and she told him she'd be home soon. He was worried that she wasn't taking care of herself.

Maeby was overseeing the production of her newest action flick "The Banana Standoff" starring Dwayne Johnson as a DEA Agent undercover as a banana stand employee trying to find where the cartel stashed a bunch of weed. Production was running into problems trying to fit the Rock inside the Banana Stand, they finally had to halt shooting to build the banana stand around him.

Maeby was also trying to get a remake done of the classic seventies hit, "The Big Yellow Joint"

"Hey, mon" She said into the phone. "It's Maeby, I gotta song that needs Snoop Lion's touch"

She finished eating and told him. "Also we're going to have to move"

"Move, why?" George Michael asked as he cleared the table and started washing the dishes.

"I sold this place to them so we can make Gangee Six…on Mars" she told with a big grin.

"Gangee Six? So you're still making those, huh?" he asked. "Didn't she, um, get killed off in the fifth one?" George Michael was correct, Gangee was killed off in Gangee Five: Eat, Pray, Love, Run.

"Yeah, but she can come back" Maeby replied. "People come back from the dead all the time. Look at Walt Disney, he's still making movies"

George Michael was going to respond that but decided it wasn't worth the argument that would follow. "Yeah, but her head was cut off!" George Michael exclaimed. "You..you can't really come back from that" George Michael hadn't actually seen Gangee Five or four, three or two. The first had scared him so badly he had nightmares for weeks. So not wanting Maeby to know that he was too terrified to watch her movies, he pretended he did by looking up the plot on Wikipedia.

Maeby looked him and got an idea. "I get what your saying, George Michael" She told him. "She's a zombie… alien." She said after thinking about it "That's even better! Zombies are huge right now. Thanks George Michael!" she said and texted her team with the new information. George Michael nodded and smiled at her. "That sounds awful" he said under his breath and he meant that both in actual movie plot and what she'd come up with for Gangee to look like, but she was too busy texting to hear him.

George Michael then remembered the why they had reconnected in the first place. "I thought, um. You were making a movie about our family. What happened to that?"

Maeby was getting hundreds of texts, telling her how brilliant that idea was. "Oh, that's going through a bunch of rewrites" she told him without looking up at him.

"Why?" George Michael asked her.

"No one knows where to start, we are a $%$ed up family." She told him. "Thanks for reminding me, so before I forget" She said looking up from her phone. "Do you mind if we make your mother have a mental illness?" then continued to respond to her team.

George Michael was confused. "My mother had cancer, why...would she need a mental illness?"

"It's Oscar bait. Jessica Chastain saw that the woman did not have a mental illness and turned the role down flat." she told him, then her phone rang, she answered it and walked out of the room.

Tbc...

-Next Time on Maeby This Time...

Maeby runs into a problem with the land she was trying to sell to the studio. But she finds the perfect solution.


End file.
